my dove flew away yesterday.

"“Jonas, Jonas,” they would say loudly, as they had once said the name of Caleb. The Giver would lead the chant. Together they would let Jonas’s presence in their lives fade away as they said his name in unison more slowly, softer and softer, until he was disappearing from them, until he was no more than an occasional murmur and then, by the end of the long day, gone forever, not to be mentioned again.

Behind him, across the vast distances of space and time, from the place he had left, he thought he heard music too.
But perhaps it was only an echo."
-The Giver

Seconds before he passed away, with my hand on Jonas's head, he looked at me and smiled as he closed his eyes. I hope he felt his body become strong, and saw his Daddy's arm's outstretched towards him. Don't worry, baby. I'll never forget you for a second.

The doctor's were always amazed at Jonas's response to sound. It's his special song now. I chose this version because this little boy voice reminds me of him, almost as if he's singing to me...




taking some time off. then it's time for me to do a huge life change.

i know i said i wouldn't blog anymore

but PLEASE pray for my little Jonas. Pray for a recovery from his latest brain bleed. Please. A world without my sweet little boy is just no world at all. He has a beautiful life ahead of him that he needs to have. Thank you.

Au Revoir.

My life has been insane lately, and I only see it getting crazier in the future.
I can already tell that I won't have any time to blog anymore. Finding time to even check my email is beginning to be a struggle.

Thank you for listening to my vents since I started this thing. My hopes, dreams, and thoughts have all spilled out into my little blog and it's been really fun. I'll check in every so often but for now I'm saying good-bye to blogging.

I never thought my fabulous destiny would involve all that it has, but i'm ready to see what else is in store for me and my family.

Shalom,
Amélie

P.S. Happy Rosh Hashanah :)

i feel so pitiful.

my sister showed me these, all of her favorite lullabies and songs. Alouette was HER song and I would always play this tape for her. she got her nickname Alouette for loving this song so much.
I can't believe I'm planning her Bat Mitzvah. She's really becoming a young woman. If this is so traumatizing I can only imagine how awful it will be with my own children. Gosh I can't wait to introduce them to these songs :) For now I'm just laying here before I have to get up, listening to these song and remembering my baby Angie before I go wake her.










(this one is in german but it is so ka-yoot! Ang used to always say schni-schnei-schnappi-schnappi-schnappi-schnap about a million times a day)


Please keep my friend Claire in your thoughts, she is going through so much right now and has been my rock through the past few months, so if she goes down i go down right with her.

Thanks for your thoughts towards Avelaine and Jonas, I think they are working because they are growing every day <3